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Monday, 05 October 2009

  • Today is Ian's birthday and I miss him so much today.  I wish we were still friends at the very least, so I could at the very least wish him a happy birthday; so that I could somehow tell him I still care about him as a person.  Not that it would make any difference to him.  I don't understand why I care so much for someone who could care less that I even exist.  Why is life so cruel like that?

    I don't miss him all that much these days, only once-in-a-while when I see things that remind me.  I'm reminded when I notice people in happy relationships and my mind just bubbles instantaneously with cynical thoughts; I want to punch him and hug him at the same time in those instances. I'm reminded when I notice all the sleezy, drunken college boys that hang out at bars and only have one thought on their mind and I remember that Ian wasn't like that....he was a nice guy. 

    I'm reminded when I realize how totally single I am.  I have to fend for myself everyday, I have know how to do everything, and this lifestyle is so ingrained in me that if I realize I can't do something on my own, I don't think to ask anyone, I just assume it is not possible.  If I wait too long, maybe I will not be able to give up this singleness.  It will be part of my permanent identity.  I don't want this to be me.  I have too much love inside of myself, ready to give away unconditionally, and it would be such a waste if nobody came along to take it. 

Sunday, 04 October 2009

  • I have been living in Ann Arbor, Michigan for a little over a month now!  And while I am absolutely loving it (I really am), I am suffering a bout of homesickness.  My good friend Sarah, from Minnesota, came to visit this weekend and I realized just as she was leaving that I wished I could hop in the car with her and go home.  As soon as she arrived on Friday we went out to dinner and I completely decompressed my month-long experience as if I had been holding everything inside for ages.  It felt so good to talk to a good friend; thank you for listening Sarah!

    However, even though I miss Minnesota, I am so thankful to be here!  My internship is great....it couldn't be a better fit for me and I am consistently energized at the end of my day there.  It re-affirms that I am in the right place, that I am following my passion.  I don't think I could be a more grateful person after being a workaholic, for 5 years, in a job I hated. 

    Classes are great too, however I cannot wait for this term to be over because I'm taking a lot of general classes that everyone in the program has to take.  Which means that they present the entire spectrum of social work as a profession...from the policymaking to the nitty-gritty counseling. I hate my policy classes; I am in love with my counseling class.  Next term I will start taking classes related to my concentration and I think that will be more endurable than these policy classes.

    I am making some good friends here too.  My roommates are very fun and easy to live with so far; each of us have seperate lives, but when we do have time to hang-out we get along very well.  My very closest friend is from my counseling class and we have lunch often during the week. And I met my newest friend on Friday night! Sarah, my roommates and I went out dancing and I recognized this one guy of my classes. I danced over to him and started making conversation with him (haha, I know, very daring for me, especially if you've witnessed my dancing skills).  Anyway, of all the things he said to me (most of which I didn't catch because it was too loud there) I discovered that U2 is his absolute favorite band too!  Like to the degree of love that I have for them!  Amazing!  After we made that discovery I'm pretty sure he professed that we would be friends forever.  Awesome....I know who I'm going to invite to a concert next time U2 is in town. 

    Speaking of U2, I did go to there concert this past month in Chicago and it was great, better than the last concert!  Someday I will show all of you pictures.

    Well, time for me to finish some homework and go to bed!  I'll try and update more next week because I definitely have more to say. 

     

     

Friday, 11 September 2009

  • My friend Sarah once told me that her motivation for diligently updating her blog was in order to stay connected to her friends, even if they didn't always comment.  I understand that idea a little more clearer than I did before now that I'm off in a place that is totally disconnected from my friends and family.  I know that all of you are a phone call or email away, but somehow it is comforting to know I can post my story anytime I want and  that people who care are reading, especially now that I am suddenly surrounded by others who don’t care as much.  Thus, I hope I will update my blog more often, with that idea in mind. 

    First things first, two clerical updates:  I have officially "disconnected" myself from Ian on facebook.  He is officially out of my life and good riddance to ever having a second thought about him.....or, at least, that is the idea.  Unfortunately, I've been missing him a good deal lately, but I attribute that to the expected loneliness of moving to a new city. 

    Number two update:  I have officially deleted my myspace account.  Just so you know.

    I don't think all of you know, but I now have two roommates now.  Both of them recently graduated from undergraduate college.  For some reason I was a little weary about telling everyone about this fact;  I'm not sure exactly why....maybe I thought some of you would judge this as an irresponsible decision. 

    Anyway, do you remember when you were done with undergraduate?  I remember.  I had this idea in my head that could finally live like a real adult, that I would be a real adult.  I would have a sophisticated life with a huge wardrobe of cute, smart, professional clothes and work downtown in some sort of executive office and consistently go to happy hour where I would meet fascinating people and.....life would be kind of.....exciting and....easy…I would have everything figured out.  I would also have this chic and sophisticated apartment; no plastic crates, no plastic dressers, no posters affixed to the wall with 3M strips.  Well, it didn’t turn out that way at all.  I think I spent a majority of my post-undergrad years depressed and confused and, to this day, I still own two plastic crates.

    Now, I'm watching these two girls with the same illusion of how life is going to be now that they are "real adults."  And here’s me, 5 years after undergrad, 5 years into “adulthood”, toting around plastic crates, trying to cram my life into the smallest room in the apartment, happily willing to accept free plastic promotional cups from bars and rental agencies, no boyfriend….just now figuring out what I want to do with the rest of my life.  I feel like I appear a huge mess, like some 40-something, mousy spinster who never kept herself in check  and has become out-of -style and out-of-touch with reality. And I feel like these two girls are thinking in the background, “I sure hope I don’t end up like her in 5 years.”

    And I realize that I am just comparing myself to the person I expected to be at this age. These two adults, what I should respectfully call them, are not even paying attention to me. I think I’m still a little ashamed of myself for taking so long to make this next step towards…..in….through adulthood. 

Saturday, 08 August 2009

  • You know, I just wrote a great post, but right as I was finishing it my computer decided to restart to some new updates.  I was intently writing, so I didn't notice the warnings.  Anyway, I'm pretty frustrated that I lost that whole post and I just want to voice that.  And on top that it is incredibly humid and hot here right now and I am crabby and tired.  So I am not going to attempt re-write this post.  It had something do with growing up, life-changing events, crap like that.  Gosh, I hate it when you lose an entire post. 

Tuesday, 04 August 2009

  • Today I was having a rare conversation with a friend at work about relationships.  She was teasing me about the guy at the coffee bar because she thinks he has "the hots" for me (her words, not mine).  And perhaps he does, but that is another story I'm not going to discuss right now.  Anyway, I told her, if I wasn't moving to Michigan, I would probably make more of an effort to get to know him.  He's smiley with kind eyes and he always seems genuinely interested in everyone that comes for coffee.  He seems like someone I could, at least, easily become friends with. 

    Then, I told her that I wasn't planning on having any relationships in grad school, it would be entirely too distracting for me, especially if it went wrong.  It would ruin me.  I felt pretty confident in making that statement, but a few minutes later I realized that I will be 29 years old when I'm finished.  29 years old.  That just seems too old to have never been loved, wanted, kissed......  It seems to old to have never shared with another, depended on another, trusted another, cared for another....

    29 years old.  It just seems like the point of no return. And I know it isn't; love can be found at any age in life.  But the thought of being a 29-year-old who still completely naiive and innocent about relationships and love as she probably was at 15.....how can anyone be okay with that?  I'm barely okay with it right now. 

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